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Contest Advice

Here's a little advice on formulating your resolution for the contest:
  1. Be clear and explicit.
  2. Keep it simple! The more complex it is, the more likely you'll still have your card at 1 a.m.
  3. What do you really want? Put it in the form of "I will not <insert wish here> in 2009!"
  4. Don't be witty unless you're absolutely sure that that hottie across the room is going to laugh. If he/she says, "I don't get it," then you've lost him/her. Remember, if you have to explain it, it isn't funny.
  5. While asking for threesomes, foursomes, and more is admirable, only one person is going to get your card, so unless you've convinced all but one of them to help you gratis (and if you have, can you please explain your technique to the promoters?) it's probably not going to happen. That said, one woman's resolution last year was "I will not get double-penetrated in 2004." She lost her card, not sure to whom...
  6. Have fun with it!